WASTED WEDNESDAY

Title says it all.
This post is being presented to you via SHITTTY MODE

I am watching my sitemeter, and I realize that I am getting the NEW HAMPSHIRITE BUMP, much similar to the bump that the New Hampshirite got from his stupid school (UNH, FAGGOTS) newspaper TNH. Also much similar to the "colbert bump".

I figure I'll share a few stories to entertain you new visitors... mostly UNH dick suckers... it's okay though, I'm not judging you for sucking dick.... faggots...
I mean.. hell even I and Bob Saggot "suck dick for coke"

Alright so a story.... okay here's one that I actually heard from a kid at UNH when I visited last weekend.... briefly

basically he was drunk as FUUUUCK and he was texting a buddy trying to get him and some of his friends to come to a crazy ass party in his pad at the GABLES (oh yeah i know my UNH shiiit) and so basically must have been feeling pretty drunk and stupid and said to the kid via text "ya'll nigga's betta' let us in the club before ya'll nigga's catch a slug" .... that was it... he didn't know he did it till he read his messages the next morning... all people in this story are white... it's a shame... please black people do not get mad about this.. they are lyrics from a song (though i'm sure you all know that already) idk what song and i'm not gonna' google it, i'm taking my buddies word for it because i know he's not a racist and he loves black people... or at least tolerates them... (yeah i guess he's just an aquantance, please don't beat me up)

anywho.... here's another story of some FUUUUCKED up UMAINE shit... this story is mad nutzz...

basically two weekends ago this kid (who i later found out is the son of one of my professors at school) was drunk, and smoking mary J, which he had done a million times before (yet he's still just in highschoool, a senior) had something happen and he started flipping out and seeing shit, all of a sudden he was seeing "evil" in his friends and was trying to perform exorcisms on them.... he got a sword, full length, like the samurai sword type shit .... and started chasing his best friend since birth around all of maine... this kid then called a friend of mine to request a Drunk Driver pickup, and to meet him at a gas station, claiming it was urgent and no time to explain, just do it... no questions asked.

so my friend goes to get him... he comes running out of the gas station yelling "duuuuude i got this gas station boritto it's mad bomb!!!!! love this diahrrea shit!" and then my buddy asks, "so why did you need a DD, can't you walk home"
and he goes "naw this kid is chasing me all over town with a sword i was afraid to go outside"

well a weekend later i was hanging out at a party and there are two local highschool kids there... and they start telling me about how last weekend they had this big thing where one of them was trying to exorcise the other... and it was an awesome connection we were able to make when i said "oh shit, i think my friend was the one who DD'ed for you"

and i'm prettttty gone right now but there were mad funny things being sad between the kid with the sword and his best buddy, he was really trying to kill him that night and they said some ridiculous shit to each other.....

the moral of the story is.... don't try to perform exorcisms or chase your buddy with a fulll length sword...

You just GOTTA love wednesdays...

thanks to the new hampshirite for the shout out... faggot. also, i look forward to you being here friday and getting WICKED shitttty and getting in troube with me, hopefully we'll both make posts out of it... i think you readers will be thankful for our friendship... the new hampshirite is one of the nicest most geniune friends I've ever known, he really does have a great handle on the whole concept of life and what it means to him and his creative mind will be taking him places he could never imagine so you all need to please continue to read and comment on his blog HERE

And I'll leave you with my most BALLIN' picture of the week.... it's of me... Matching my sox, to my shorts,TO MY BOXERBRIEFS, to my BOTTLE OF MOTHER FUCKIN GREY GOOSE VODKA!!!! on a mother fucking wednesday night!!!! yeeeeeee!!!! enjoy that shiiiiiiiit! BTW i do have a six pack if anyone wants a full chest pic ;-) btw please i need at least 3 comments on this post or i'm going to kill the new hampshirite when he gets here friday... sooo save his life and comment. thanks UNH faggots